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4 minute read · Published August 19, 2024

The best Command AI alternatives

Latest Update September 12, 2024

Alright you little rascal, you googled Command AI alternatives and you want us to help you not buy us? Well, you're lucky we're an honest bunch around here and are happy to talk about alternatives since Command AI isn't 100%, all the time, for every company, the right choice.

So here come the best alternatives to our own product.

Cry

Stars didn't align to use Command AI? Not a priority right now? Mom said no? It's easy to think you need some off-brand version, but frankly, you might just need a good cry.

We're big advocates of mental health around here and believe in processing emotions in healthy ways! Our recommended protocol is the RAIN method, pioneered by Tara Brach:

  1. Recognize: Really feel the feeling that's inside you. Is it a deep compassion for the plight of unassisted users? Perhaps a deep-rooted fear of the wrath of engineerin when you ask them to hard-code the 17th NPS survey this quarter? Whatever it may be, recognize it, label it, embrace it.
  2. Accept: It's difficult to sit with emotions, but as the Buddha said: What you resist, will persist.
  3. Investigate: Find which part of you is feeling that difficult emotion. Is it your inner child who saw one too many pop-ups? Is it the product manager part of you?
  4. Nurture: Embody the most empathetic part of you - the part that knows what you need and can give it to you. Here's an affirmation to repeat: I will be okay with Command AI. I will feel safe and secure without Command AI. I will not be fired without Command AI.

Crying: Pros and Cons

Pro

  • Cleanses difficult emotions
  • Helps you move on to next stage of grief

Con

  • Users still unengaged
  • Commitment to lifelong process of healing

But that's not the only Command AI alternative.

Reject modernity, embrace tradition

We all want to go back to easier times, before dopamine culture ruined our attention spans and social media corrupted our youth.

As an alternative to buying Command AI, why don't you give your users back a little bit of that early internet bliss? Instead of buying the world's best user assistance platform, why don't you get your users one of these bad boys?

That's right, the on-paper user guide. In a blissfully analog experience, your users will relive the glory days of the internet - before popups and before social media?

Best of all: You won't have to deal with pesky advanced targeting like with Command AI. Who needs to laser-focus their targeting on admins of SMB customers? Target page 171, paragraph 3.2, buddy!

Plus, your assistance will never be annoying as that shiny binder gathers dust. Integrations? It integrates perfectly well with any bookshelf.

Printed manual: Pros and cons

Pro

  • Look like an intellectual when reading in public
  • Welcome respite from modern digital life

Con

  • Hard to update
  • Will literally never be used

But there's a more digital Command AI alternative too.

Make it a punishment for Bob

You have a Bob. Bob is the engineer who goes home early to spend time with non-stakeholders (he calls them his kitts or something?). Bob tells you he'll need 2 months for something you need in 2 weeks. Bob complains about potential scalability issues when you need a proof of concept.

You hate Bob. And now you can punish him.

Because you didn't buy Command AI (which makes it easy for you to update in-product widgets without involving eng), you now have a ton of entirely pointless engineering work.

"Hey Bob," you yell as you point finger guns at him across the office. "Got time for a quick task?". "Sure!" Jerry answers while moving Leetcode off of his seventh monitor. You smirk. Your ambush worked. "We'll just need to launch test 5 versions of this feature announcement and target them to different user groups with relevant copy."

Bob says yes, thinking it's a one-time thing. But he doesn't know your nefarious plan has worked. Now Bob is the popup guy. Screw you, Bob. You extinguish your cigar. After Bob leaves, the rest of the office gives you a standing ovation. Today was a good day.

Bob: Pros and cons

Pro

  • Work will get done
  • Outlet for your anger

Con

  • Finding someone to do it when Bob leaves

But Bob isn't the only Command AI alternative with a beating heart.

Carrier Pigeons

Coo-coo, your users will no longer think you're poo-poo!

Sure, you didn't get your hands on an AI support agent like our Copilot, but you have something even better: The good ol' carrier pigeon.

Whenever your users send in a question, send over one of the birds and respond to them within SLA. This is a great support solution that also builds your brand. Who needs instant, accurate AI responses that slash your support tickets in half when you can literal birds?

Carrier Pigeon: Pros and cons

Pro

  • Cool
  • Resilient to OpenAI outages.

Con

  • If in NYC: Might make too many friends
  • Poops everywhere

Okay, one final Command AI alternative.

Give up

I've always hated Tony Robbins. That whole shtick around never giving up, always keeping going, being persistent and so on? Straight up cringe.

If you can't have Command AI, it's okay to admit defeat. Your users just won't be happy, and that's okay! Giving up is always an option.

Wanted to drive more engagement? Just don't! Wanted to use AI to do something about that pile of support tickets? Screw it and wait for that pile to become a mountain. Wanted to improve your onboarding? I'm sure your users will figure it out like they always have. Universal search search with Spotlight? That's called cmd+f from now on!

Giving up: Pros and cons

Pro

  • Don't have to work on it

Con

  • Won't get results (but who cares you've given up)

If none of these Command AI alternatives have sounded great so far, we have one recommendation:

Book that demo, pal

The above Command AI alternatives were researched by professional, real researchers who got really good grades, so if you didn't find this authoritative account of Command AI alternatives compelling, maybe there's only one option:

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